


Home for the Holidays

by frantic65



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-28
Updated: 2015-01-05
Packaged: 2018-02-27 07:12:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2683928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frantic65/pseuds/frantic65
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Short Holiday story told in drabble format set in Season 1. Justin is determined to find out as many of Brian's secrets as he can, and maybe then his own Holiday wishes will come true.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Home for the Holidays 1: Thanksgiving Day 

Justin came downstairs to Debbie’s crowded kitchen, disappointed that Brian hadn’t taken the hint and followed him up to his bedroom.

“Where’s Brian?” he asked, looking around curiously, feeling uneasy as glances knowingly passed back and forth.

“Sit down and have some pumpkin pie, honey.” Deb said finally, avoiding his gaze.

“Is he outside smoking?” He headed for the door, but Deb shook her head sadly.

“Sunshine, he had to leave.”

“Without me?”

“He always has dessert with his family, sweetie.” Lindsay answered, gently.

Deb patted his cheek, placing pie before him. “Later tonight, I’ll tell you a Holiday story.”

2\. Whose Story To Tell?

“Has Brian mentioned his family to you at all, honey?” Deb was in the kitchen, packaging pounds of pasta earmarked for the AIDS Hospice.

“Not really.” Justin answered, passing her another Tupperware container. “He told me he’s not close to his Dad, but never really talks about his Mom or anyone else.”

“Sis.” Vic shot her a warning glance.

“What?” Deb challenged.

“It’s Brian’s story to tell, not yours.” Vic answered quietly.

“You weren’t here, Vic. You didn’t take that kid to the emergency room on a regular basis.” Deb bristled indignantly.

Vic headed upstairs.

“Tell me, Deb.” Justin whispered.

3\. Winds of Change

While Justin waited for Debbie to satisfy his curiosity about Brian’s background, his mind drifted to the state of his own fractured family.

He couldn’t believe the mess his coming out had caused.

Yet, with each passing day it became painfully obvious that his father wasn’t going to come around and make any sort of peace, uneasy or otherwise, when it came to Justin’s lifestyle choice.

And all the wishing in the world wasn’t going to change his father’s mind.

After seventeen years of unconditional love, the winds had changed direction and left nothing but unconditional hate in their wake.

4\. Beginnings  
“At first, I thought Brian was trouble with a capital ‘T’.” Deb sat Justin at the kitchen table.“And he was. Such a smart-mouthed, angry, disrespectful little shit.” She shook her head.“But Michael adored him from day one, and I could tell Michael became important to Brian, too.”

Justin listened silently, accepting the cup of coffee Deb handed him.

“Michael had it tough in school. Bullies and such, you know?” Justin nodded in complete understanding.

“Brian changed all that. He won my trust by keeping my Michael safe. It broke my heart I couldn’t do the same for him.”

5\. A Big Fucking Mess

“The Christmas Brian was fifteen was the worst.” Deb picked up a towel and started drying dishes busily.

“His mother was always volunteering at some Holiday function or another at church. His father would be pissed at her, and take it out on Brian. It was a big fucking mess.”

“And no one did anything?” Justin asked angrily.

Deb pointed a warning finger in his direction. “Back then, things were different. People just considered it discipline.”

“Deb, that’s so fucked.” Justin glared at her, and she sighed and patted Justin’s hand.

“I know, baby. And that’s why he ran away.”


	2. Chapter 2

Home for the Holidays 6: No One Knew

“What did his parents do when Brian ran away?” Justin rubbed his face tiredly, knowing the answer wouldn’t be good.

“At first, no one realized he was gone.” Deb studied her nails nervously. “His mother was wrapped up in some Hanukkah-Christmas Interfaith Goodwill Network, and his father only noticed Brian when he was pissing him off in person.”

“What happened?” Justin whispered.

“Well, apparently Pittsburgh’s young gay runaways tend to head to the Big Apple.” Deb said with a knowing look in his direction.

Justin blushed and squirmed.

“But without a stolen credit card, he ended up on Vic’s doorstep.”

Home for the Holidays 7: Cover Up

“Vic must have wanted to kick Brian’s ass when he showed up like that.” Justin could only imagine his reaction.

“Well, he didn’t read him a bedtime story!” Deb let out a raucous laugh before sobering. “Vic called me tout suite. He would never have turned Brian away, but a fag with an underage, runaway boy staying with him in those days was just asking to be branded a pedophile.”

“Jesus.” Justin thought he’d had it bad.

“They took the next bus back. I called Joan and covered for Brian, who was devastated when he realized how he’d endangered Vic.”

Home for the Holidays 8: A Difficult Love

Justin sat quietly while Deb ran upstairs to get ready for work. He knew there was so much more to Brian’s story than what she knew and had told him.

He wondered if he would be able to convince Vic to talk about it, if he promised to keep it to himself.

Justin had quickly learned that staying in Brian’s life was a difficult balancing act.

Loving Brian often made Justin feel like a tree as it struggled to survive through the changing seasons.

Brian’s moods ran from winter’s frost to summer’s blazing heat in the blink of an eye.

Home for the Holidays 9: Behind the Bullshit

Deb watched Justin from the top of the steps. He was lost in thought, and she felt a small twinge of guilt, knowing it was due to their conversation about Brian’s past.

She’d held her tongue all these years, never revealing any of the painful details about Brian’s hellish upbringing to anyone.

It was easy to for those who didn’t know better to call Brian a selfish asshole who only cared about getting his dick sucked.

But Deb knew behind Brian’s bullshit was a good man, and maybe this kid would turn out to be his one chance at happiness.

Home for the Holidays 10: Positive Reinforcement

Justin was slumped on the couch, aimlessly channel surfing, when there was a knock on the door.

“Hey!” Justin smiled as he opened the door to reveal a smirking Brian.

“Hey.” Brian brushed by, leaving Justin to trail behind as he headed for the stairs and Justin’s room.

Faithfully following in his footsteps, Justin tried not to speculate on the significance of Brian seeking him out tonight instead of dragging Michael to Babylon to obliterate the Holiday bullshit he hated.

Accident or not, Brian had chosen him over anonymous ass tonight, and Justin was eager to offer some positive reinforcement.


	3. Chapter 3

11\. An Unexpected Question

Justin threw his head back and came hard on his chest and stomach, Brian’s lean body pressing against his as he thrust one last time, mouth covering Justin’s as he shot his own load.

“That was hot.” Brian smiled wickedly as he traced his tongue downwards until he was licking gently at a drop of spunk drying on Justin’s left nipple.

“Mmmm.” Justin was in his post-orgasmic speechless stage, hearing imaginary marching bands playing, and enjoying the rare display of Brian’s intimacy.

“So, did you and Debbie have a nice chat?” Brian lit up, pulling Justin’s suddenly tense body closer.

12\. A Rule for the Nosy

“Did Deb give you all the gory details on my tragically dysfunctional upbringing?” Brian glared at a guilty-looking Justin.

“She kind of volunteered some information…” Justin’s voice trailed off at Brian’s raised eyebrow.

“Yeah, and you kind of volunteered some questions, I’ll bet.” Brian sounded annoyed, but he pulled Justin comfortably against him.

“The next time you want to stick your nose where it doesn’t belong, come to me first, twat.” Brian settled back and sighed tiredly.

“Don’t be mad at Deb.” Justin pleaded.

“Don’t worry, she’ll still get red roses and candy on Mother’s Day. Now, go to sleep.”

13\. Protector  
Justin sat on his bed, idly sketching random objects, his mind not really focused on what he was drawing.

In the two weeks since Thanksgiving, he’d only seen Brian a few times, always at the diner when Justin was working and unable to do more than smile and wave.

Justin knew Brian’s distance was deliberate, but he also knew that eventually circumstances would bring him back into Brian’s orbit…and bed.

He glanced down at his sketchpad, and smiled when he saw Gus, his childhood teddy bear, staring back at him.

He wondered if Brian’s earliest memories included a protector.

14\. Expectations  
Justin heard a familiar horn sound in front of Deb’s house, and jumped up to look out the window.

He waved when he saw Brian leaning against the jeep, cupping his hands around the cigarette he was struggling to light in the wintry breeze.

Justin bounded out to meet him, breath clouding in the cold Pittsburgh morning air.

“Hey.” He greeted, tilting his face for a kiss as Brian hesitated before slowly leaning in to press their lips together. “Where are you going?”

“Christmas shopping.” Brian replied with a shudder. “It’s bullshit, but it’s expected.”

Justin smiled. “Want some help?”

15\. Unexpected  
Justin headed up the walkway, surprised when Brian cut the ignition and followed him up Deb’s front steps.

After a day of shopping interspersed with a few bouts of dressing room fucking and sucking, Justin was sure Brian would ditch him for a night with the boys at Babylon.

Justin paused in the doorway, reluctant to ask Brian’s intentions at the risk of being ignored for another two weeks.

Brian’s eyebrows rose in question as Justin turned, and gestured with a nervous smile at the threshold.

“Look, its mistletoe.”

Brian rolled his eyes and leaned down slowly. “Pucker up, Sunshine.”

16\. Changing Traditions  
Justin was sitting in the kitchen of the house he’d grown up in, visiting his Mom and Molly while Craig was in Chicago on business.

Molly giggled as he helped her decorate Christmas cookies, both of them getting teasingly scolded by Jennifer for giving a reindeer three eyes, or putting an icing cast on a gingerbread man.

He left before dinner, using a non-existent shift at the diner as an excuse.

Waving good-bye, he looked sadly past the angels Molly had pressed into the newly fallen snow, unable to ignore the For Sale sign that marred the otherwise pristine landscape.

17\. Personal Preference

“Ho-ho-ho, Sunshine.” Brian slid up behind Justin at the GLC Children’s Holiday Party. “Why so glum? If Santa has no room on his knee, you’re welcome to bounce around on my lap.”

Brian leered suggestively, but Justin only sighed and walked over to the buffet table.

Brian followed and frowned at the selection of chicken nuggets, and mini hotdogs. “What the fuck is this?”

“Fucking finger foods, asshole.” Deb answered and flicked the back of his head. “Kids love it.”

“Yeah, well I personally happen to prefer finger fucking. This shit will clog their arteries by the time they’re ten.”

18\. Holiday Bullshit

“What’s up with Tiny Tim?” Brian gestured to Justin who was wistfully watching the children get their pictures taken with Santa.

“Poor kid.” Deb snapped her gum, shaking her head. “This is the first Christmas his family won’t be together. He went to visit his mom and found out his asshole father moved out.”

“That sucks, Deb, but he shouldn’t let it ruin his life. Someone should tell him Norman Rockwell was full of shit. Being home for the holidays is highly overrated.”

“Not everyone had your shitty childhood, honey.” Deb shot him a quick glance. “Go cheer him up.”

19\. A Word of Advice

Brian slid behind Justin, pressing in close and eliciting a shiver from him as he whispered in his ear.

“No pouting, Sunshine.” He purred seductively. “I have plenty of toys for us to play with at the loft, batteries definitely included.”

Justin closed his eyes and twisted around in Brian’s arms, nuzzling into his neck, breathing in the familiar scent of the man he had grown to love so much.

“I feel like such a stupid shit for breaking up my family.” Justin lamented, grunting in surprise as Brian pushed him away.

“Self-pity makes me soft. Grow some balls, Sonny-boy.”

20\. Assholes in Glass Houses

Justin lit a cigarette and stood shivering on Debbie’s front walkway, miserably swaying from one foot to the other, trying to keep warm.

Deb peeked out the front curtains, fretting under her breath about insensitive assholes living in glass houses, drawing a gentle rebuke of, “Stay out of it, Sis” from Vic.

“It’s not right, Vic, the way he lets Brian treat him. It’s not healthy.” Deb fumed, frustrated by trying to hold her temper. “It’s fucking cold outside and he’s still just a baby.”

Headlights flashed in the window, pulling a surprised squeak from Deb. “Holy Shit! It’s Brian!”

21\. Christmas Most Carnal

Justin stopped pacing, heading back toward the house as Brian hopped out of the jeep, his long legs outdistancing him easily.

“Waiting for someone?” Brian queried innocently.

“Not for you!” Justin answered sullenly, still hurt from being tossed aside at the Christmas party.

Brian moved in closer and caressed Justin’s pouting lower lip with the pad of his thumb. “Come on, Sunshine. Put on something tight and slutty. It’s Dick-ens Night at Babylon. You can limp around pretending you’re Tiny Tim until I cure you with a back room fuck.”

Justin had to laugh. “Brian, you’re such a nasty freak.”


	4. Chapter 4

22\. The Season of Giving

Babylon was packed with holly jolly fags dressed in their very merry seasonal finest.

Brian scowled, pulling Justin closer on the dance floor as a drunken Santa in a G-string tried to bump and grind against him.

“Fuck off, Saint Dick!” Brian growled in annoyance.

“Way to go, Baby!” Emmett gushed as he sashayed up in holiday sequins. “Maybe your dance partner, Ebenezer Screws, could learn a few things about the Season of Giving from you.”

Brian ignored Emmett, pulling Justin toward the bar. “What the fuck was that about?”

"Nothing. I’ve been volunteering with Vic at the Hospice."

23\. Options

Brian decided they should make an early night, so they left Babylon after only a few drinks and a quick blowjob in the back room.

Justin moved as close as he could to Brian in the slowly warming jeep, laughing when Brian invited him to warm his hands between his thighs.

Justin was happy to accept and was soon sliding his now toasty fingers in teasing circles over Brian’s dick.

They cruised by the entrance to the University of Pittsburgh and Brian casually reached a gloved hand down to still Justin’s movements.

“Any news about your future place of matriculation?”

24\. Conditions

“I may have to put college on hold for a year or so.” Justin spoke quietly into the muted blue glow of the bedroom. “Just until I come up with tuition money.”

“What about your fucking father?” Brian asked angrily.

“He’ll only pay for Dartmouth.” Justin admitted sadly.

“That’s bullshit. There shouldn’t be any fucked up conditions on your education.”

Brian fucked him from behind that night, draping himself like a second skin as he pressed hot kisses on the soft skin of Justin’s neck and shoulders, before slamming into him hard and fast, fingers tangled tightly in Justin’s hair.

25\. The Kinney College fund

“How did you afford college, Brian?” Justin asked tentatively. It was always risky asking Brian questions about his past.

“I got an athletic scholarship behind Jack and Joanie’s pathetic backs, and got a loan for the rest.” Brian lit a cigarette and began blowing smoke rings.

“It must have been tough getting financial aid on your own. All the paperwork I’ve seen needs parents to co-sign.”

“Read the fine print, twat, the co-signer has to be an adult, not a parent.” Brian turned to look at Justin.

“All it took was a phone call to New York City. To Vic.”

26\. Applied Science

Justin stared dreamily out the window of his Advanced Science classroom, the droning voice of the teacher blending together with Brian’s husky sex-tinged tones in his subconscious.

Justin had been studying at the diner, science book open, when he'd felt hot breath on his neck and Brian’s sexy murmur in his ear.

“And what are you learning today, Sonny-boy? Human anatomy? You’d get a perfect score if you’d study mine.”

Justin had laughed, flattered by the unsolicited attention. “No, it’s astronomy.”

“Winter solstice? Write this down. Shorter days equal longer nights of fucking and sucking. Hands-on demonstration tonight at Babylon.”

27\. Epiphany

Justin had been distracted all day, trying to figure out why Brian ran so hot and cold when it came to him.

“Earth to Justin, come in Justin.” Daphne stood in front of his locker, arms waving, trying to get his attention.

“Hey Daph, sorry about that.” He gave her a weak smile.

“Where were you anyway? It’s like you were a million miles away.” She waited for an answer, nudging him impatiently when he didn’t immediately answer.

“I was in the middle of an epiphany.” He laughed and she wrinkled her nose in confusion.

“Brian Kinney gives a fuck!”


	5. Chapter 5

28\. Forgotten Promise

“What the fuck are you doing here?” Brian ran his hands through his morning bedhead, ignoring the fact that it was actually mid-afternoon, trying to blearily figure out why the doublemint twins of St. James were standing there wearing their tasteless school blazers and hideous ties.

“You said Daph and I could come by and use your PC for a school project last night. Remember?” Justin’s smile was beautiful yet slightly mocking. Brian had been totally wasted and would have agreed to anything after ingesting Anita’s toxic cocktail of drugs.

“No fucking way, Justin!”

“Brian! A promise is a promise.”

29\. A Time for Miracles

Vic and Justin walked home from the Hospice in silence, their footsteps muffled as snowflakes continued to gently fall.

“I love when it snows on Christmas Eve.” Vic observed, not missing the frequent sighs coming from his companion. “Is Brian picking you up tonight?”

“I doubt it.” Justin answered woefully. “He’d rather be at Babylon getting his dick sucked than spending time with an annoying brat like me.”

“Is that so?” Vic shot Justin an amused glance, not mentioning the jeep that he’d spotted parked in front of Deb’s house. “Well, Christmas is supposed to be a time for miracles.”

30\. Have Yourself a Kinky Little Christmas

Justin woke up on Christmas morning in Brian’s bed, stretching happily as he realized where he was.

Vic had told him Christmas was a time for miracles, and it seemed like he was right about that after all.

Brian had been unusually playful at Deb’s the night before, threatening to introduce Justin personally to all of the kinky toys being used by Deb’s Christmas bondage elves.

Everyone had laughed like little kids when Deb had shrieked at Brian to “Keep your dildos and butt plugs away from Sunshine’s ass,” covering her ears and humming when Justin had announced, “Too late!”

31\. Priorities

Brian stalked into the loft, tossing his briefcase on the floor, fingers already loosening his tie as he glanced first at the television, then at Justin, who was sprawled on the couch, apparently too engrossed in a program to even bother to say hello.

Brian’s bad day started to get worse. “What the fuck are you watching on my new 60” Plasma TV, couch potato?”

“Brian!” Justin jumped up and mollified Brian by fawning over him nicely. “I’m glad you’re home. Come watch this special on Kwanzaa with me.”

“Christ! Enough with the fucking holidays already! Come blow me instead.”

32\. Practice What You Preach

“Brian.” Justin whispered into the darkness, reluctant to break the mellow spell that sometimes surrounded Brian after he’d fucked some of his demons away.

“My mom told me that my dad admitted he missed seeing me for Christmas. Do you think I should call him?” Justin felt Brian stiffen slightly before roughly dragging Justin to spoon snugly against him.

“Words are cheap, Justin.” Brian’s voice was muffled as he spoke into the nape of Justin’s neck. “It’s a man’s actions that reveal the truth.”

Justin sighed, clutching Brian’s arm closer to his chest wondering if Brian practiced what he preached.

33\. Inspiration

Justin had borrowed his mom’s car and driven to a park that had an intriguing view of the river with the city in the background.

It was a somewhat dismal scene given the bleakness of the Pittsburgh winter, but Justin was inspired by the gritty landscape, and sat in the car busily sketching.

He was working on his portfolio, having recently decided that since his dad had missed him at Christmas, maybe he’d be willing to pay his tuition to PIFA if Justin could manage to get a partial scholarship.

Maybe then his dad would be proud of him again.

34\. Anxieties

Brian pinched his nose as he listened to Justin queen out over the lack of fortune cookies in their take-out.

“How could they forget the fortune cookies?” He fumed, stomping around like the teenager he was. “Isn’t that like immediate bad luck or something?”

Brian pulled him over to the couch and pushed him down. “Yeah, it’s like an ancient Chinese curse that only works on bitchy drama queens. Pipe down, princess, you’re giving me a fucking headache.”

“Sorry.” He immediately straddled Brian’s lap, brushing his hair off his forehead gently. “I’m just a little anxious waiting for college letters.”

35\. Regret

Brian stood before the window, cigarette in hand, watching the city below rushing to get ready for the start of a new year.

He wasn’t a nostalgic man, but he considered himself honest, and the past year had caused him to question some long-held beliefs.

He’d never admit it in the cold light of day, but something deep within his core had shifted in ways that he knew he could never reverse.

Gus had innocently started the process, with Justin somehow close behind, and Brian’s only regret was that someday their eyes would reflect the disgust and disappointment he deserved.

36\. Booty Call

It was New Year’s Eve and Babylon was at its decadent best. Brian rested his arms on the rails of the catwalk, surveying the writhing masses of fags hoping to get lucky before midnight.

He was trying to look nonchalant, but his eyes kept straying to the entrance of the club, searching for a blond twat who apparently needed a fucking personal invitation to drag his bubble butt to the party.

Brian dialed Deb’s. “Hey, Vic. Is there a teenaged drama queen moping around the house?”

He listened, then sighed, “Tell him to have his ass out front in ten minutes.”

37\. A Happy New Year

Justin came downstairs to Deb’s mostly empty kitchen, disappointed that Brian seemed to have left without saying good-bye again.

The holiday season was officially over, and Justin felt no closer to being a permanent part of Brian’s life now than he had on Thanksgiving Day.

He gave Deb a weak smile at her sympathetic glance.

The front door suddenly opened and Brian stuck his head inside. “Ready, Justin?”

“Huh?” Justin responded in confusion.

“The fucking holidays are over, it’s time to go home. Aren’t you coming?”

Justin intercepted Vic’s knowing wink.

The New Year was off to a miraculous start.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a completed story. I will be posting several parts a few times a week until finished. Total word count about 4,000 words.


End file.
